Oh How Southern of you!

   

     It all started in February, I was minding my own business when I received a message via Facebook, requesting my services to host a poetry event centered around the James Baldwin Film, "I am not your Negro" (hell yeah, I thought to myself) Sure, I'd be interested but let's make a date so that we can chat and talk about the idea of the event, By this time I'd already seen the film twice, missing parts because I was unable to control myself emotionally. I was ready for this opportunity. James Baldwin being one of the main reasons I speak not of current climate but of overall wellbeing in my work. I believe as he did that circumstances were of temporary relevance when you have no understanding of self. When you lack that understanding everything you do and attempt will result in a fascist form of chaos!

Subjected to mind controlled religious America, I too participated in the Church. With a regarded collection of knowledge I came to know that the teachings of compassion and love had nothing to do with spending my whole Sunday in the midst of people who in my right mind, would not ever want to have a conversation with me, let alone be in their presence. it have nothing to do with, people liking you, or of Bull crap people have come to know as typical behaviors of Christians. And I use the term loosely, because I have discovered what that word means.
Back to my point, James Baldwin taught me more about who Christ Is, than most ministers I encountered in my early childhood. It wasn't until Adulthood that I found a minister that carried the same spiritual embodiment as James Baldwins writings and I had to move miles away from my home of Birmingham, Alabama to receive that teaching.

I really was ready for this opportunity to moderate a panel and poetry reading. Everything, I'd read and lived... was for this opportunity. So after calling and calling, playing phone tag for weeks, I finally get another message on Facebook asking if I was available to moderate a discussion on Friday, I received the message on March 27th, which was a Monday, my brother's Birthday. I replied yes, what is the program set-up for the evening, panel participates, the flow of the evening....Basically asking for details and they replied, I'll give you a call this evening with the details. It is today April 30, 2017, 11:51 am, I have yet to receive a phone call nor a follow up message.

Okay, what is this about Shaunteka, why is this such a big deal...

Oh you thought this post was for you?  No ma'am, No Sir! This is so that I can look back and say DAMN, Girl Look at this right there!

I receive event invites and solicitations through Facebook messenger all the time, this is not my first Rodeo around the park. In the history of my career, this is the second situation that has not paned out.

It is only the people that I associate with that had been the serious disappointment, I don't know what people think. However, what I will no longer tolerate is you disrespecting the use and value of my time knowledge. Couple years into my stage sharing career, a promoter bumped into me at the gas station inquiring about me not contacting him back about a performance, the conversation went as follows:
 Him: Hey, you're the poet from the other night, I can't remember your name.
 Me: *Side Eye*
 Him: No, your name escapes me but you did the poem about "What if you could go back, and erase  the pencils sketches of out right now."
Me: Hmmmm, My Name is Shaunteka.
Him: Yea, that's right. It's Kinda hard to pronounce. I'm Glad I bumped into you...hey take my number.
Me: *pulls out phone*
Him: I want you to perform at an event, in a few weeks. I gave your boy my number and told him to tell you to hit me up.
Me: Oh Okay, When and where is the event? Is it a Showcase type of thing or do you want me to feature!?
Him: Oh, uhh, the show is next Friday and I already have everything in place now, maybe next time.
Me: *puts phone back in pocket, without taking the number* If you have everything in place? Why mention it?
Him: Oh, I just wanted to let you know I was trying to put some money in your pocket, but your Boy didn't want you to have it, cause he didn't relay the message.
Me: *That Shaunteka "Nigga What" Smile* "Oh, How Southern of You, wanting to assist me, do I look like I'm a member of the First Wives Club. Dude, you gave your number to the person you wanted to have it, INjoy!

After that he told someone that was really close to me that I was soft and passive.
Passive yes, I have been known to be passive, usually when I come across someone I have no interest in having an active relationship with and soft, Yes, I am the epitome of soft, no I am not easy to mold, I can not be compressed, I am not easy to cut, but I am Mellow, by definition is meek rather than sharp and I do not expect some unintentional asshole that was trying to low key get personal time with me, even attempt to assist in my career you FUCK FACE!

How fucking Southern of him. Southern not "Southern Gentleman" Southern but Girly. HA! Yes, I have seen Southern Gentlemen in action for years.. See He'll ( a Southern Gentleman) will approach YOU requesting your assistance in presenting an event or He'll send his Wife. If he knows your Mate/Partner or they are friends he casually mentions to them of wanting your help with something but leaves it at that. So, yeah, these new ages ASSHOLES, I'm not checking for them, I am running from them actually, doing smudge stick rituals before I see them in anticipation of seeing them. because these Fuck Boys are everywhere... How southern of you to want to take care of me, Like my father has not already prepared me to take care of myself, How fucking southern of you to assume that your fucking pennies would put an additional number in front of the decimal for me. How southern of you to think that my brothers haven't already schooled me on niggas like you, in turn I have schooled my nieces and younger cousins to look out for Niggas like you. YASSSSS, I said Niggas because its you that have sullied the arts and world with your insecure bullshit about wanting to assist somebody, when really you are the one that needs assistance. You need to contact your mother, aunt, granny or whomever it was that made that have as attempt to raise you and request a do over... Maphacker DO BETTER. Rolling into my inbox when I have already provided you with my number, You weak spirited man, whose mother should have beaten your ass more often...Stay the Fuck away from me... My information is public, My business hours are Tuesday thru Friday 7am - 6pm, you would be wise not to use them.

Also: the Southern Gentleman reference is a Shout Out to all men, that conduct themselves in a respectful manner. And don't come to me with that "women don't respect themselves bullshit shit" because you are not encountering a woman you are encountering a GIRL, learn the difference asshole. My first memory of gentleman behavior is from the South, glad to see that manners were taught to those beyond.