The Denial of a Sensitive Romantic
Last night, or this morning, Yea, it was morning. sometime after 3:30 am, I woke up.
the cause, for what seems to be nothing; is driving me crazy right now!
You ever think about something so hard that is makes your head hurt.
I fell asleep listening to my John Coltrane play list on spotify. I know a bunch of you listen to iTunes, I don't. But anyway, when I woke up, Written in Stone by Robert Glasper was playing and I had that same feeling I had the first time I heard the song which was earlier this year, on the plane.
I fell asleep listening to the album, I woke up while "Written in Stone" was on... even then it tripped me out because I started at the beginning...track 1 and written in stone is track 10!
Get it!
Okay, so last night, I had no clue spotify would queue Glasper after Coltrane, what a very interesting pot of randomness but they did, and because of it, I woke up sometime around 3:30 am listening to Written in Stone.
When I say listening, what I am saying is my body was heating up just as it did the first time I heard it playing. I felt relaxed, at ease.
This song, is a conjuring. It calls to something deep inside that I've yet to embrace, something that I've yet to own.
I can't articulate, this knowing I have.
Yes, it's the unknown. The part that I can't quite put my finger on.
Now for clarification. I was asleep on the plane the first time I heard the song.. I remember hearing the song just as the chorus was starting, immediately lifted my eye mask, checking the screen to see the name of the song. Upon completion, I went back to sleep. And the next time around when the song came back on....I woke up.
Same thing happen last night...I fell asleep listening to Coltrane, woke listening to Robert Glasper's Written in stone.
Maybe it's the Key? (it is a funky composition...that synthesizer, that bass, that lead guitar...whew!)
Maybe it's the Lyrics?
It's gotta be something else, it can't be the lyrics, right?
Have you heard this song?
Yes, YOU! Have you heard the song?
If so, do you know what is being said?
Okay, so let's go over the lyrics together...
Verse 1:
I mean... I've not internally experienced what he's singing about, and If I have, I have not ever owned up to it. my history says, I would be a fool to feel or own up to feeling this way, right?! Well, maybe once or twice 😉
But these lyrics, invoke something within that wakes me up when this song is playing, spiritually and physically. Tells me that Mine is coming, am I ready for this type of union.
But have you heard the key that this song is being played in?
Do you think it can just be the lyrics?
Have you felt this way about someone?
Did you tell them?
Has anyone ever said this to you? or better yet, Has the person you would want to say these words to you, said them, yet?
I am a kindhearted romantic. A Sensitive of some sort. I am not naive to the fact that my generation was trained and brainwashed into thinking romantic love is the only love that represents wholeness for women, and without it you are broken. But, that form of thinking is what makes us broken. We currently reside in a checklist society, that says once I have everything on my checklist then I'll be happy. But, if you're waiting to check boxes how will you ever be open to the mate that is requesting you to play your hand with the cards face up? The mate that will act out the Lyrics of this song?
I'm taking it too far, you think? Maybe, but indulge me for a minute. Check this scenario.
My Love Language got me all messed up, I knew it, the moment I was given that book in 2009.
The five love languages my ass, I have always been a giver of gifts, and I love when someone says, "hey, I saw this and thought of you" so naturally receiving gifts was my love language. I've had people to go to Timbuktu verbally about materialism and I done had to break them down to a peanut because, receiving a gift you did not ask for is not materialism. First of all, I can buy myself whatever it is I want, Always have and Always will, the love language receiving gifts is not about the gift, it's about the you thinking of me when I am not in your presence and you showing that through a token. Someone giving you an unexpected gift at an unexpected time, really makes your walls sugary! NO!?
YES!?
Which is why I think this song wakes me out of my sleep and calls to me in the midst of REM
this song is an act of commitment. a longing of trust. a need to know that its just you two...
NOBody else let's leaP together!
It is the epitome of romance to me. What can I say, Flowers, wine, food, and a hot bath not prepared by me are the makings of a wonderful day.
Yet, I am also a realist, that cringes at the thought of possession, the thought of not being my own person, the thought of having to put someone else's feelings and emotions ahead of my own scares the living crap out of me! And that is what people think relationships and marriage is supposed to be and it is not. I don't know what it is, but I do know that it is not possession!
But, I have to own the Romantic that lives within for she is a shining beckon of HOPE that tells me one day... I'll be the Girl in the song.
Until then, I'll make sure that song doesn't end up in my nighttime queue
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fM4hsfNXgUA
the cause, for what seems to be nothing; is driving me crazy right now!
You ever think about something so hard that is makes your head hurt.
I fell asleep listening to my John Coltrane play list on spotify. I know a bunch of you listen to iTunes, I don't. But anyway, when I woke up, Written in Stone by Robert Glasper was playing and I had that same feeling I had the first time I heard the song which was earlier this year, on the plane.
I fell asleep listening to the album, I woke up while "Written in Stone" was on... even then it tripped me out because I started at the beginning...track 1 and written in stone is track 10!
Get it!
Okay, so last night, I had no clue spotify would queue Glasper after Coltrane, what a very interesting pot of randomness but they did, and because of it, I woke up sometime around 3:30 am listening to Written in Stone.
When I say listening, what I am saying is my body was heating up just as it did the first time I heard it playing. I felt relaxed, at ease.
This song, is a conjuring. It calls to something deep inside that I've yet to embrace, something that I've yet to own.
I can't articulate, this knowing I have.
Yes, it's the unknown. The part that I can't quite put my finger on.
Now for clarification. I was asleep on the plane the first time I heard the song.. I remember hearing the song just as the chorus was starting, immediately lifted my eye mask, checking the screen to see the name of the song. Upon completion, I went back to sleep. And the next time around when the song came back on....I woke up.
Same thing happen last night...I fell asleep listening to Coltrane, woke listening to Robert Glasper's Written in stone.
Maybe it's the Key? (it is a funky composition...that synthesizer, that bass, that lead guitar...whew!)
Maybe it's the Lyrics?
It's gotta be something else, it can't be the lyrics, right?
Have you heard this song?
Yes, YOU! Have you heard the song?
If so, do you know what is being said?
Okay, so let's go over the lyrics together...
Verse 1:
Tell me Girl, it’s you and me
In this life together
Fuck all your friends prophecies, they don’t know us at all
Tell me girl it’s you and me
No matter the weather
what we have is meant to be
Girl its written in Stone
Chorus:
I can go on
Won’t last to long without you
Oh girl, without you
Can’t hardly breathe
Can’t conceive this life without you
Of girl without you.
I mean... I've not internally experienced what he's singing about, and If I have, I have not ever owned up to it. my history says, I would be a fool to feel or own up to feeling this way, right?! Well, maybe once or twice 😉
But these lyrics, invoke something within that wakes me up when this song is playing, spiritually and physically. Tells me that Mine is coming, am I ready for this type of union.
But have you heard the key that this song is being played in?
Do you think it can just be the lyrics?
Have you felt this way about someone?
Did you tell them?
Has anyone ever said this to you? or better yet, Has the person you would want to say these words to you, said them, yet?
I am a kindhearted romantic. A Sensitive of some sort. I am not naive to the fact that my generation was trained and brainwashed into thinking romantic love is the only love that represents wholeness for women, and without it you are broken. But, that form of thinking is what makes us broken. We currently reside in a checklist society, that says once I have everything on my checklist then I'll be happy. But, if you're waiting to check boxes how will you ever be open to the mate that is requesting you to play your hand with the cards face up? The mate that will act out the Lyrics of this song?
I'm taking it too far, you think? Maybe, but indulge me for a minute. Check this scenario.
My Love Language got me all messed up, I knew it, the moment I was given that book in 2009.
The five love languages my ass, I have always been a giver of gifts, and I love when someone says, "hey, I saw this and thought of you" so naturally receiving gifts was my love language. I've had people to go to Timbuktu verbally about materialism and I done had to break them down to a peanut because, receiving a gift you did not ask for is not materialism. First of all, I can buy myself whatever it is I want, Always have and Always will, the love language receiving gifts is not about the gift, it's about the you thinking of me when I am not in your presence and you showing that through a token. Someone giving you an unexpected gift at an unexpected time, really makes your walls sugary! NO!?
YES!?
Which is why I think this song wakes me out of my sleep and calls to me in the midst of REM
this song is an act of commitment. a longing of trust. a need to know that its just you two...
NOBody else let's leaP together!
It is the epitome of romance to me. What can I say, Flowers, wine, food, and a hot bath not prepared by me are the makings of a wonderful day.
Yet, I am also a realist, that cringes at the thought of possession, the thought of not being my own person, the thought of having to put someone else's feelings and emotions ahead of my own scares the living crap out of me! And that is what people think relationships and marriage is supposed to be and it is not. I don't know what it is, but I do know that it is not possession!
But, I have to own the Romantic that lives within for she is a shining beckon of HOPE that tells me one day... I'll be the Girl in the song.
Until then, I'll make sure that song doesn't end up in my nighttime queue
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fM4hsfNXgUA
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